Anger

Anger..isn't it something we all hate with a passion?
Yet, we all have problems with it, one more then the other.
Learning to manage your anger, is one of the hardest things in life, yet, it is still possible.
My own anger is like this flame, flowing trough my body, never cooling off, only getting hotter and hotter. When will my point of not tolerating the heat any longer?
I wish i knew that answer, would make my life a lot less complicated. But when i snap, i will snap with consequences, i will rage, and no, i don't know what i will do.
Controlling this flame for i think...2-3 years now, and for the last few months turning this flame into energy, energy i can control, instead of it controlling me.
No idea what i can do with it yet, but it will come to me sooner or later.
I hope something good, but we all have had our hopes shattered into pieces atleast once in our lifetimes, sometimes small pieces, and sometimes bigger pieces, eitherway, hope was nowhere to be found afterwards, but time heals all wounds.
This flame though, is somewhat the same as my evil twin, neither can life without eachother, this flame was given me by him, and i can not give it back.
For all i know i have witnessed to much wickedness in my lifetime, and maybe wickedness has witnessed me, eitherway, i'm completely fucked if i loose control.
But i am still sitting here, with this shroud of peace all over me, this untouchable feeling covering me. Is this flame a blessing or a curse?

I'll stay cautious, cause i've been cursed before.

But i must admit, i love it... some part of me fucking loves it.
Why? Cause.. good question there.. why do i love this flame that feeds me anger?
Guess it is because it gives power, and i am powerhungry.
Coming to think of it, hunger for power has driven more than 1 to madness, maybe i am not that untouchable as it seems, yet, i still am driven to gain more, and still can not be touched, so i might get best of both in the end.

If i would ever get the choise to kill my flame, i don't know yet what i would do, because for now, that flame is me, that flame is living me.
Till i collapse under the weight, i will keep on learning, learning what to do with this, and i might even end up doing right for once in my life...

' I Self Lord And Master, shall bring disaster to evil factors
Demonic chapters, shall be captured by Kings
Through the storms of days after
Unto the Earth from the Sun through triple darkness to blast ya
with a force that can't be compared
to any firepower, for it's mindpower shared'

Guru, Gangstarr