futility

Seems it doesn't really mather what i say or do, neither of the 2 seem to be reaching goal. Do i shoot so poorly, or is the target dodging?
I truly am trying the best i can, but it seems it is not enough. Think i should just back off a little, and let the target crawl to me, bit harsh, but it's a last resort.
So many things that still need change, and so little will to change it seems.
Maybe if i was something more, a somebody, a bit better, my efforts would be noticed, but i can wish all i want, an ignore is what i get. And that is breaking me apart, allthough there is little left to break but the dust that is shattering.

Seems i should beg on my knees for better treatment, see if i'm being noticed then.
But no, i dont beg, i cant beg, i wont beg, it might be worth it, but the pride is troubling the mind.

nothing left to say that needs to be said, whatever has not been said, is better left unsaid...